When your conscience hits, you knock it back with pills....

Happy Easter. My fear is that this has gone on already too long, and that I'm better off straightmost dead. Springtime dead. I figure a good solid seven months of classic asian studying for the CFA in December will be ample. Of course, you can't comprehend asian studying habits unless you've been through it. It basically means, for a period of time, you are all but gone from society. Personally, I've been falling short lately and recently. Most Americans not born of first generation immigrants can't comprehend this discipline or sacrifice, or even begin to deal with it, or most americans in general simply can't. Quite simply it's the grasshopper-ant fable whatever the fuck. Do it earlier in life so you don't lock yourself into mediocrity(unless you are suited and happy with mediocrity and that's fine too as it's all relative). But most people I know can't accept the early sacrifice, and can't see the long term positive results for generation upon generation. It would be easier for these periods of serious professional studying, to be in complete solitude, or at least surrounded by chinks or dorks of similar caliber. My fear is that even the most spartan puritanical study sessions cannot withstand the insiduous rotten and ingenious hell that I've let accumulate in the past few years, ingenious though, so hat's fucking off to that, and as such, this long weekend brought nice weather but ZERO quality studying. Starting May 1, if not earlier I will and must embark on a spaceship of solitude for several months. Oh, the kids will weep, but they'll be better off. And in closing, I can promise one thing though, regardless of the under-utilized potential and results of my life: I will at the very least, plant the seeds that will once and for all crush all fucking idiotic self-perpetuating, self-destructive idolatry, and only when it is done, W.I.M.P's will thank my rotting corpse for it.